It's in the pause that I rediscover myself

Pausing is an invitation for reflection. It's in the pause that we have insights. When we rest, our system allows for integration. The pause is the key for our personal next quantum leap.

I was just watching this amazing video of Linda Perry's life concert http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beWZW3VSHD0, in which she asked one of her fans to step up and sing. Linda was so centred in her own success of being on stage that she fully supported the strong voice and passion of her fan. Her fan in return was putting all of her heart into sharing on stage what looked like a very personal under the shower expression. She allowed her passionate self and her feelings about the song to fully come through and be seen. Having the courage to show what one is moved by and be seen with one's soul's passion is a rare gift and very inspiring. May we all have that courage. May pausing allow us to step into our gifts and share them with the world.

Who am I ...?

Who am I ...?

This is a question or rather a quest, I have consciously followed since I am 14. I have found beautiful answers of beyond the mind experiences of pure stillness within, a sense of non-self. This is what keeps me meditating, for returning to these experiences of stillness or emptiness.

Then, there remains the question of who is this personality that I am constantly forming and reforming? Childhood experiences, parental now internalized voices, collective adopted attitudes, ancestral influences, acquired knowledge, personal interests, expected behaviours... Piece by piece, I am recognising yet another part, consciously looking at it, questioning it, shedding it. This is a pathway of purification not generally known to be connected to meditation practice, but necessary in order to deepen any sitting meditation experience. 

Ultimately, there is only unity

Humanity keeps fighting each other, feeling superior or inferior even in our daily lives, believing our very different lifestyles of different collective groups are better than the other, "Our way is the right way", or "I am more spiritual than they are".

What if we lean acceptance of differences, honouring honesty and integrity of each person's chosen life's path? What if we drop into our own heart, acknowledging our own vulnerability and insecurity and from that perspective only see, feel and listen to the so called other, acknowledging their vulnerability and insecurity. This way we can have compassion for each other, supporting each other in inner growth and further heart opening.

I've experienced that if I am in a difficult situation with someone, that the moment I drop into my heart, acknowledging for myself how I feel, the energy between me and the other person shifts. The moment I am centred in love, the other person feels safe, does not need to be defensive and we can co-create or move into different directions peacefully.

We are all part of one humanity, breathing the same air, drinking the same water, eating food grown on the same planet. We might as well co-create together in love.

Wisdom from the kitchen

Are You a Carrot, An Egg, or a Coffee Bean?

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs and the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil without saying a word.

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.

Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what do you see?"

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.

She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.

The daughter then asked. "What does it mean, mother?"

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity—boiling water—but each reacted differently.

The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.

The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.

The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water they had changed the water.

"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?"

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor.

If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hours is the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate to another lever?

How do you handle Adversity? Are you a Carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean? 

"A sleeping dog is a happy dog"

I saw this line on a van today set up for dog play. This really resonated with me. Play and Sleep Time! This sounds so wonderful. Sleeping is being in bliss.

Who are you?

I was asking this question to myself and my best girl-friends when I was 14. My friends did not receive the depth of the question, only answered with their name and thought I was nuts. I started writing poems, short stories and entered deep contemplations in my longing and search for my Higher Self.

Too much to integrate

Seems like one of these days when everything just feels like too much. Not enough time to get everything done, loose ends that need to be completed, paper work delayed, friends waiting to be called. Everything should be on priority number one, but somehow I have to operate in linear time. Another day in which I postpone getting out into the sun and taking time to cook a wholesome meal just for handling the next steps of ..., actually of what?

There was a day when I had realised that living in and enjoying this moment was more important than getting things done. Somehow, there are still energies pushing me forward to complete karma and maybe there is Diving Perfection in all of it.
Wishing you a blessed day!